Subject: Sports (Page 116)

You know what they say about big hitters… the woods are full of them.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Golf Sports

It tastes like any other sport drink.

Japanese marathoner
Misspokements Sports

Opening games make me nervous; to tell the truth, I’d rather open with our second game.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Misspokements Sports

Many people think the Cards at the end of the wire will cross the finish line first.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

National League umpires wear inside chest protesters.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I need her like Custer needed Indians.

professional baseball player
Baseball Sports

The Champagne they have stored is getting more valuable every year.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Alcohol Baseball Food/Drink Sports

He's the kind of player who usually comes along rarely and sometimes never.

(1927 – ) American football coach
Football Misspokements Sports

No fighter comes into the ring hoping to win – he goes in hoping to win.

English boxing champion
Boxing Misspokements Sports

Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Age Golf Sports

I love boxing. Where else do two grown men prance around in satin underwear, fighting over a belt? … the one who wins gets a purse… they do it in gloves. It's the accessory connection I love.

American comedian
Boxing Sports

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backwards in a mirror.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Baseball Sports

I’ll be sad to go, and I wouldn’t be sad to go; it wouldn’t upset me to leave St. Louis, but it would upset me to leave St. Louis; it’s hard to explain. You’ll find out one of these days, but maybe you never will.

Canadian-born American hockey player
Misspokements Sports

A lot is said about defense, but at the end of the game, the team with the most points wins, the other team loses.

(Bob Costas replied with just, Uh…well…ok.)

professional basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

When Neil Armstong first set foot on the moon, he and all the space scientists were puzzled by an unidentifiable white object; I knew immediately what it was… that was a home run ball hit off me in 1933 by Jimmie Foxx.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Activities Baseball Sports

I'm glad it's him and not some other puke.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Baseball is a game which consists of tapping a ball with a piece of wood, then running like a lunatic.

Baseball Sports

If officials called every penalty they saw, there would be no players on the ice and no one in the rink.

professional hockey referee
Hockey Sports

We can’t win at home. We can’t win on the road. I don’t know where else we can play.

Canadian hockey coach, general manager & commentator
Hockey Sports

People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year; they don’t realize that most of us only make $500,000.00.

professional baseball player
Baseball Money Sports

Detroit’s so bad this year they might lose their bye week.

(1953 – ) comedian, political commentator and television & radio personality
Football Sports