Subject: Sports (Page 74)

When the ducks are walking, you know it is too windy to be playing golf.

American professional golfer
Golf Science/Weather Sports

Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Malaprops Sports

Urban should know. Almost 30 of his players have been arrested over the years, so he apparently knows a bad guy when he sees one.

sports reporter
Football Sports

Reporter: Is it true that you’d throw at your own mother.
Gomez: You’re damn right I would, she’s a good hitter.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

Listen, ump… how can you sleep with the lights on?

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

We’re trying to accomplish in five games what in previous years it took 162 games to do.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

They had us with the walls to our back.

professional baseball player & manage
Misspokements Sports

They say golf is like life, but don’t believe them; golf is more complicated than that.

(1927 – 1998) American professional golfer
Death Golf Sports

There are three things in the world that he held in the smallest esteem – slugs, poets and caddies with hiccups.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Golf Sports

It is completely dead out there. I’ve been phoning myself up and disguising my voice just for a bit of interest.

English football player & manager
Sports

You’d be a overweight neurotic fighter too if your name was Shirley Crabtree.

Sports

I found out that it's not good to talk about my troubles; eighty percent of the people don't care and the other twenty percent are glad you're having trouble.

Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball People Problems Sports

Always remember Goliath was a 40 point favorite over David.

American football & basketball coach
Misspokements Sports

I'll go another 15 rounds with Holmes if Howard will quit announcing football!

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

It's a good thing Babe Ruth isn't still with the Yankees. If he was, George Steinbrenner would have him bat seventh and say he's overweight.

American baseball player
Baseball Body Fat Sports

When a fielder gets the pitcher in trouble, the pitcher has to pitch himself out of the slump he isn’t in.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level.

professional baseball player & executive
Misspokements Sports Success

It's easy to stay in the majors for seven and a half years when you hit .300; but when you hit .216 like me, it's really an accomplishment.

professional baseball player
Baseball Sports

A tough day at the office is even tougher when your office contains spectator seating.

Basketball Sports

Because there are no fours.

professional basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

Sleep came as it must come to all British heavyweights, midway in the fifth round.

(1905–1982) American sportswriter
Boxing Sports