Author: Will Rogers Page 3

There are three kinds of men: the ones who learn by reading; the few who learn by observation; the rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Intelligence People

The difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Government

If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government

He’s the first president to discover that what the American people want is to be left alone.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
America Places

You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Individuals Intelligence Memory People

The English should give Ireland home rule – and reserve the motion picture rights.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Places

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Government People Situations Things

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Characteristics

Ain’t it funny how many hundreds of thousands of soldiers we can recruit with nerve; but we can’t find one politician in a million with backbone.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Military Politicians

If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
People Problems Self

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Money

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Emotions People

I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Appearance Body Old

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Animals Situations

You know everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Intelligence

Nothing you can’t spell will ever work.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Problems