Author: Sign Page 3

For Old Dimes Sake

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We are open on Labor Day.

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Beware of the Dog. – The Cat is Not Trustworthy Either.

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Please Note – As from 27th October all staff will be required to arrive at work with teeth – if you don’t have, please provide proof that you are getting some – thank you

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Shoplifters Will Be Beaten Over the Head With an Organic Carrot

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In memory of Leonard Ball, who hated fat people.

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A-1 Sales & Services, Inc. – Tree, Debris & Stump Removal, Domain Names, Website Hosting & Development

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Park At Your Own Risk Due To Possible Limb Failure

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Private Driveway Protected By Mountian [sic] Lions

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For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church.

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Terminal Drugs

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One shoe shined absolutely free.

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The courtesy phone is temporarily out of service. For assistance please call 503-849….

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Do not open this door when locked.

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Beyond This Point You May Encounter Nude Sunbathers Eating Waffles

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Irish you a Merry Christmas!

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The Superstore — Unequaled in Size, Unmatched in Variety, Unrivaled Inconvenience

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Caution – Heavy Plant Crossing

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Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we diet!

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Caution – No Warning Signs

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No Shooting – Guest from Sept. 1st to Jan 1st

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