Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… there is no future in writing history books.

Confucius say… practical nurse is one who marries a wealthy, terminally ill patient.

Confucius say… banker who sits in freezer, will have frozen assets.

Confucius say… to circumcise whale, send down four skin divers.

Confucius say… who checks out woman's package, doesn't always work for UPS.

Confucius say… creative Chinese chef without utensils can still find ways to stir soup.

Confucius say… marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life.

Confucius say… getting sick at the airport, could be a terminal illness.

Confucius say… squirrel lay on rock and crack nuts, man lay on crack and rock nuts.

Confucius say… humorous question on an exam is called testicle.

Confucius say… two wrongs may not make a right; but two Wrights made an airplane.

Confucius say… two wrongs not make right, but two rights make U-turn.

Confucius say… if you look in fortune cookie, you are a pathetic fool who seeks advice from bakery products.

Confucius say… alcohol is the cause of some problems and the solution to others.

Confucius say… some sex Is good… more Is better… too much Is just about right.

Confucius say… who dates dynamite lady, gets big bang out of her.

Confucius say… house without toilet is uncanny.

Confucius say… he who sniffs Coke, gets ice cube up nose.

Confucius say… Viagra is like Disneyland… a one hour wait for a 2-minute ride.

Confucius say… 400 pound lady, who likes both men and women, is a bisexual built for two.

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