Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… if men had breasts, they would wear off the pockets of their shirts.

Confucius say… miners with illuminated helmets, will feel lightheaded.

Confucius say… learn to masturbate… come in handy.

Confucius say… wise man buys his wife fine china, so she won't trust him to wash it.

Confucius say… who start crystal ball factory, bound to make a fortune.

Confucius say… woman like dollar bill; hard to pickup, but worth effort.

Confucius say… if a soda can goes to school, it will take fizz ed.

Confucius say… Australian Kiss is similar to French Kiss, but given down under.

Confucius say… every teenager should get a high school education… even if they already know everything.

Confucius say… New York manufacturer of gentlemen's headwear is called Manhattan.

Confucius say… worst thing a wife can get on her twenty fifth wedding anniversary is morning sickness.

Confucius say… best way to slow a runaway horse, is to bet on it.

Confucius say… man who run in front of car get tired.

Confucius say… question authority and the authorities will question you.

Confucius say… man who masturbate only screwing himself.

Confucius say… alcohol is the cause of some problems and the solution to others.

Confucius say… alarm clock is something that makes people rise and whine.

Confucius say… is better to give than receive – especially advice.

Confucius say… he who makes love in grass, gets piece on earth.

Confucius say… man who let woman on top, will screw up.

Confucius say… fool and his money are soon partners.

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