Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… if the washroom upstairs is occupied, there is a hypotenuse.

Confucius say… man who eat many prunes, sit on toilet many moons.

Confucius say… man who is impotent will have Willy-nilly.

Confucius say… girl who sit on lap of judge get honorable discharge.

Confucius say… man who make love to cash register, come into money.

Confucius say… enemy is sometimes nothing more than a friend who got wise to you.

Confucius say… man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Confucius say… Platonic relationship develops after two good friends are tired of screwing each other.

Confucius say… girl who slides down bannister, makes monkey shine.

Confucius say… cigarette is a pinch of tobacco, wrapped in paper, fire at one end, fool at the other.

Confucius say… woman who dates gambler, gets cheated on.

Confucius say… man who read woman like book prefer braille!

Confucius say… is better to be looked over than overlooked.

Confucius say… man who wish to make headlines should sleep on corduroy pillow.

Confucius say… if a soda can goes to school, it will take fizz ed.

Confucius say… chemist who fall in acid, get absorbed in work.

Confucius say… girl who sit on lap of jockey get hot tip.

Confucius say… of all the things you wear, your expression is most important.

Confucius say… man can keep his youth, by giving her money, furs and diamonds.

Confucius say… early to bed, and early to rise, makes a man healthy… but a social loser.