Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… fortune you seek is in another cookie.

Confucius say

Confucius say… adults are just wrinkled kids who owe money.

Confucius say

Confucius say… who checks out woman's package, doesn't always work for UPS.

Confucius say

Confucius say… to circumcise whale, send down four skin divers.

Confucius say

Confucius say… wise man makes sure that his wife's birthday cake is short one candle.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

Confucius say

Confucius say… who lay woman on ground, get peace on earth.

Confucius say

Confucius say… nail on board is not good as screw on bench.

Confucius say

Confucius say… he who eats ice cream in car, is a sundae driver.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man who take lady on camping trip, have one intent.

Confucius say

Confucius say… marriages are made in heaven… so are thunder & lightning.

Confucius say

Confucius say… lawyer is someone who writes an eighty-page document and calls it a brief.

Confucius say

Confucius say… Einstein stared at his cousin's boobs, he discovered 'Theory of Relative Titty'.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man in bathroom with tool in hand is not necessarily a plumber.

Confucius say

Confucius say… criticism is not nearly as effective as sabotage.

Confucius say

Confucius say… woman with big breasts has high-rise accommodation.

Confucius say

Confucius say… look for helping hand on end of own arm.

Confucius say

Confucius say… if you want your dreams to come true, don't oversleep.

Confucius say

Confucius say… when the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

Confucius say

Confucius say… fool and his money are soon partners.

Confucius say

Confucius say… to circumcise whale, send down four skin divers.

Confucius say