Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… men are like fish… neither would get in trouble if they kept their mouths shut.

Confucius say… man who lay girl on hillside is not on the level.

Confucius say… beauty is only a light switch away.

Confucius say… man who cries while he masturbates is a real tearjerker.

Confucius say… egotist is a person more interested in himself, than in me.

Confucius say… men are like spray paint… one squeeze and they're all over you.

Confucius say… if men had breasts, they would wear off the pockets of their shirts.

Confucius say… never argue with a fool… he may be doing the same thing.

Confucius say… never tell a one legged hitch hiker to hop in.

Confucius say… he who thinks only of number one, must remember, it is next to nothing

Confucius say… trouble with bucket seats is that, not everybody has the same size bucket.

Confucius say… few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

Confucius say… humorous question on an exam is called testicle.

Confucius say… marriage is like taking a bath… after you've been in it for a while, it isn't so hot.

Confucius say… man with head up ass, can't see for shit.

Confucius say… Australian Kiss is similar to French Kiss, but given down under.

Confucius say… man who fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.

Confucius say… artificial insemination is procreation without recreation.

Confucius say… never marry a woman with big hands… it will make dick look smaller.

Confucius say… confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.