Subject: Money (Page 36)

My doctor is wonderful; once, when I couldn’t afford an operation, he touched up the X-rays.

(1918 – 2007) American entertainer, actor & television host
Doctors Health Money

A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer
Entertainment Film Money

It ain't no disgrace to be poor, but it might as well be.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Money Poverty

Anybody who plays the stock market not as an insider is like a man buying cows in the moonlight.

(1797 – 1879) American businessman & speculator
Activities Money

We pay for the mistakes of our ancestors, and it seems only fair that they should leave us the money to pay with.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Mistakes Money

Real happiness is when you marry a girl for love and find out later she has money.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Emotions Happiness Love Marriage Money Wealth

Take Home Pay: An amount of money which is called that because it is never big enough to go anywhere else with it.

Definitions Money

Invest in inflation… it’s the only thing going up.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Money

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

American basketball player
Basketball Money Sports

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Money

…if you rub up against money long enough, some of it may rub off on you.

(1990 – 1946) newspaperman & writer
Money

You may be a redneck if you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Autos Education Money People

Misers make wonderful ancestors.

Frugal Money

The compromise will always be more expensive than either of the suggestions it's compromising.

Money Murphy’s Laws

The first time you go out after your wife’s birthday, you will see the gift you gave her marked down fifty percent.
Corollary: If she’s with you, she’ll assume you chose it because it was cheap.

Husbands Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Wives