Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 2)

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

I don't have anywhere to put my elbows when I putt now.

professional golfer
Golf Sports

He has the touch of a gay hairdresser.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Once when I'd been in a lot of bunkers, my caddie told me he was getting blisters from raking so much.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Nobody but you and your caddie care what you do out there, and if your caddie is betting against you, he doesn't care, either.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Until you play it, St. Andrews looks like the sort of real estate you couldn't give away.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

It's not whether you win or lose – but whether I win or lose!

professional golfer
Golf Sports

My handicap is that I don’t have a big enough beer cooler for the back of my golf cart.

professional football player
Golf Misspokements Sports

There are two things that won’t last long in this world – dogs that chase cars and pros that putt for pars.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

If I wasn't a golfer, I would still be miserable – but not as miserable.

(1947 – ) American comedian, writer, actor & television producer
Golf Sports

My golf is improving… yesterday I hit the ball in one!

Golf Sports

A tap-in is a putt that is short enough to be missed one-handed.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

The three things I fear most in golf are lightening, Ben Hogan, and a downhill putt.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Columbus went around the world in 1492; that isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Bogey: The number of strokes needed to finish a hole by a golfer of average skill and above-average honesty.

Definitions Golf Sports

Golf: A game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose

(1856 – 1924) 28th U.S. president & politician
Golf Sports

By the time a man can afford to lose a golf ball, he can't hit it that far.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
Age Golf Old Sports

Golf… is the infallible test; the man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Golf Honesty Sports

My best score ever was 103. But I've only been playing fifteen years.

(1935 – 2012) American football player, sports announcer & actor
Golf Sports

Isn't it great to live in a society where the penalty for lying to a congressman can be up to 30 years in jail, but the penalty for a congressman lying to you is another two years in office.

(1955 – ) American sportswriter
Beliefs Congress Golf Government Honesty Law Lies

Golf, especially championship golf, isn't supposed to be fun, was never meant to be fair, and never will make any sense.

author
Golf Sports