Subject: Communication (Page 77)

She was just a passing fiancée.

Communication Wordplay

Snoring: Sheet music.

Definitions Sleep Wordplay

Peeping Tom: A window fan.

Definitions Wordplay

Interesting: A word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the talking.

Communication Definitions Speech

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Communication Intelligence Speech Wisdom

Those big-shot writers could never dig the fact that there are more salted peanuts consumed than caviar.

(1918 – 2006) American writer
Books Communication Reading/Writing

I try to leave out the parts that people skip.

(1925 – ) novelist & screenwriter
Books Communication Reading/Writing

I bought a dictionary, and the first thing I did was look up dictionary… it said “you’re an asshole.”

(1973 – ) American comedian
Books Communication Language Reading/Writing

If I wasn’t talking, I wouldn’t know what to say.

(1958 – ) Canadian hockey player & announcer
Communication Misspokements Speech

Kids say the darndest things.

(1912 – 2010) Canadian-born American radio & television personality & humorist
Children Family Speech

Don't abbrev.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

I have given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Books Communication People Reading/Writing Self

During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me; just the other night she called me from a hotel.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Communication Sex Speech

I want to help clean up the state that is so sorry today of journalism; and I have a communications degree.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Communication Misspokements

The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Communication Reading/Writing

I had the right to remain silent, but I had lost the ability to.

(1956 – ) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Speech

Freudian Slip: When you say one thing but mean your mother.

Communication Definitions

Wouldn't let 'em get in a word wedgewise.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Communication Malaprops Speech

Barometer: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Old Science/Weather

The Internet is just a world passing notes around a classroom.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Communication

Men can say things in stores women can't believe like, "but I already have a pair of black pants.”

(1952 – ) comedian
Men People Shopping Speech Women