Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 68)

In the marble orchard.

Miscellaneous

If she gets to heaven she'll ask to see the upstairs.

Miscellaneous

I have a plan, but … If I win, I don’t want to broadcast to the enemy exactly what my plan is.

Miscellaneous

More than plenty

Miscellaneous

We don’t air our dirty laundry out in public.

Miscellaneous

It was so sweet backstage, you should have seen it: the Teamsters were helping Michael Moore into the trunk of his limo.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Miscellaneous

Sure as a cat's got climbing gear.

Miscellaneous

I don’t know who St. Valentine was, but I hope he died alone, surrounded by couples.

(1972 – ) English actress & comedian
Miscellaneous

Pass some words

Miscellaneous

Always… no wait… never…

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Miscellaneous

If you had a brain you'd play with it.

Miscellaneous

He can get glad the same way he got mad, or else he's gon' die unhappy.

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He couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket.

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People will be able to see to Christmas.

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Held his hind leg.

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It was so good it would have brought tears to a glass eye.

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Well, shut my mouth.

Miscellaneous

When a dog bites a man that is not news, but when a man bites a dog that is news.

(1819 – 1897) American journalist, author & senior government official
Miscellaneous

Women wear a pair of panties but only one bra.

(1946 – ) American comedian
Appearance Clothing Miscellaneous

My Elizabeth was as pure as the driven snow; and I am the only driver she ever had!

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Miscellaneous

Full as a tick

Miscellaneous