Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 73)

Mean enough to charge hell with a quart of ice water.

Miscellaneous

Long as a month of Sundays.

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They scoffed when I told them I’d one day learn the secret of invisibility; if they could only see me now.

(1980 – ) English magician & comedian
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He looks like the dog's been keepin' him under the porch.

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His porch light’s on, but he ain’t home!

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People will be able to see to Christmas.

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Better to be the head of a fly than the buttocks of an elephant.

(1938 – 2010) Russian politician
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Strong as a new well rope

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I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it.

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If all the world is a stage, and all the men and women merely players, where do all the audiences come from?

(1922 – ) English comedy writer & television presenter
Entertainment Miscellaneous

You can put a porcupine in a wood chipper, but you will not make maple syrup.

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Don’t judge someone until they have tossed your salad.

(1954 – ) American actor & singer
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Cute as a sack full of puppies.

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Don’t care to.

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He/She’s got teeth like a rake.

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I've had an apple out of that bag.

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Every old crow thinks hers are the blackest.

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He’s dumb as a sack full of hammers.

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Like three feet up a bull’s ass

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I hope she lives to a 150 and looks it.

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I’ve wondered where this [fear of clowns] started, and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad.

Miscellaneous