Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 74)

Y'all stay the night. We don’t have extra beds, but I’m sure we can find a nail to hang you on.

Miscellaneous

One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don’t run with a wooden stake.

Miscellaneous

All the dress shops are sold out in Washington. It’s hard to find a great dress for this inauguration.

(1946 – ) American cretin & 45th U.S. president
Miscellaneous

She’s cuter than a bug’s ear.

Miscellaneous

It's as cold as all git out!

Miscellaneous

He has more information than a Sears Roebuck catalog.

Miscellaneous

During the Middle Ages, probably one of the biggest mistakes was not putting on your armor because you were ‘just going down to the corner.’

Miscellaneous

Looks like you came to a goat’s house for wool!

Miscellaneous

She’d scare a haint up a thorn tree.

Miscellaneous

One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don’t run with wooden stakes.

Miscellaneous

He’s so chincy, he can call his every dollar by its first name.

Frugal Miscellaneous Money

If you make ships in a bottle, I bet the thing that really makes your heart sink is when you look in, and there at the wheel is Captain Termite.

Miscellaneous

Mr. Ruskin is about to begin a work of great importance and therefore begs that in reference to calls and correspondence you will consider him dead for the next two months.

(1819 – 1900) English art critic, social thinker, poet & artist
Miscellaneous

He went and blessed me out!

Miscellaneous

With every new sunrise, there is a new chance. But with every sunset, you blew it.

Miscellaneous

It come up a bad cloud.

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My hind foot!

Miscellaneous

I’m so mad I could eat barbed wire and spit nails.

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That poor boy’s so slow, it would take him two hours to watch 60 minutes.

Miscellaneous

The bigger the box, the bigger the things that won't fit in it.

Miscellaneous

Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you’re coming home, his face might burn up.

Miscellaneous