Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 63)

View All Murphys Laws

Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.

Autos Murphy’s Laws

Digestion is the great secret of life.

Life Murphy’s Laws

Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don’t drink too much… then again, don’t drink too little.

Age Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Old

All bridge hands are equally likely, but some are more equally likely than others.

Activities Games Murphy’s Laws

When working on a project, if you put away a tool that you're certain you're finished with, you will need it instantly.

Murphy’s Laws Things Time

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

Murphy’s Laws

When you want to unlock a door but only have one hand free, the keys will be in the opposite pocket.

Murphy’s Laws Things

It if smells bad and is sticky, it will eventually find its way onto your children or your shoes.

Murphy’s Laws Situations

If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.

Facts Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

It never heals correctly.

Health Murphy’s Laws

All probabilities are 50%; either a thing will happen or it won't.

Murphy’s Laws

A cigarette placed in an ashtray will go out if you stay in the room; if you leave the room, the cigarette will topple to the table, burn through, and drop to the floor, where it will smolder until it descends to ignite the drapes in the room below.

Murphy’s Laws

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

1. All bicycles weigh 50 pounds.
2. 30-pound bicycle needs a 20-pound lock and chain.
3. A 40-pound bicycle needs a 10-pound lock and chain.
4. A 50-pound bicycle needs no lock or chain.

Murphy’s Laws Things

When eating an elephant, take one bite at a time.

Eating Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

You can’t lose an old golf ball.

Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

A falling body always rolls to the most inaccessible spot.

Murphy’s Laws

No matter how many hot dogs you consume at home, they always taste better at the ball park.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Those who rise to executive positions lack the qualifications for anything lower.

Murphy’s Laws Work

Exceptions prove the rule… and wreck the budget.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Wind velocity increases directly with the cost of the hairdo.

Hair Murphy’s Laws