Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Science/Weather
»
Heat
It is so hot… I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… I saw a robin dipping his worm in iced tea.
Johnny Carson
(1925 – 2005) television host
Heat
Science/Weather
Exaggerations
It is so hot… Dick Cheney waterboarded himself.
David Letterman
(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Heat
Science/Weather
Dick Cheney
Exaggerations
It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… potatoes cook underground.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
But if you figure in the wind chill factor, it’s only 102.
Dave Marr
professional golfer
Golf
Heat
Science/Weather
Sports
On a 104 degree temperature
I'm glad we don't have to play in the shade.
Bobby Jones
professional golfer
Golf
Heat
Science/Weather
Sports
On being told that the temperature in a tournament was 105 degrees in the shade
It is so hot… the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… Ed is actually putting ice in his Scotch.
Johnny Carson
(1925 – 2005) television host
Heat
Science/Weather
Exaggerations
It is so hot… I saw a chicken lay a fried egg.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… the trees are whistling for the dogs.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
In India, ‘cold weather’ is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door knob and weather which only makes it mushy.
Mark Twain
Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Heat
Science/Weather
India
It is so hot… by the time I got home from buying eggs, I had twelve chicks in the bag.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
I like to play in the low 70′s… if it gets any hotter than that I’ll stay in the bar!
Bob Hope
(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Golf
Heat
Science/Weather
Sports
It is so hot… today I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It's hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell.
Anonymous
Expressions
Heat
Science/Weather
Temperature
It is so hot… I saw a squirrel fanning his nuts.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… I saw two trees fighting over a dog.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
I play in the low 80's. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
Joe E. Lewis
(1902 – 1971) American comedian & singer
Golf
Heat
Science/Weather
Sports
It is so hot… no shirt, no pants, no problem.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
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