Subject: Sports

These ball boys are marvellous; you don’t even notice them; there’s a left-handed one over there that I noticed earlier.

Tennis commentator
Misspokements Sports

They expect an umpire to be perfect on opening day and to improve as the season goes on.

American baseball umpire
Baseball Sports

Linford Christie’s got a habit of pulling it out when it matters most.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

You know what they say about big hitters… the woods are full of them.

(1910 – 1983) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by an occasional miracle.

Golf Sports

The only really unplayable lie I can think of is when you're supposed to be playing golf and come home with lipstick on your collar.

(1929 – 2016) American golfer
Golf Sports

The bum was up and down so many times I thought he was an Otis elevator.

boxing trainer & manager
Boxing Sports

John Daly's longer than Greg Norman… he’s even longer than War and Peace.

American sports columnist
Golf Sports

Gonzo leaps like a giraffe and grabs it.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Oi, leave our flies alone, Jardine. They’re the only friends you’ve got here.

Stephen Gascoigne (1878 – 1942) Australian sports fan & heckler
Sports

Your clubs.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian
Golf Sports

You can't expect Mr. Ed to keep up with Secretariat.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns.

Golf Sports

In my prime I could have handled Michael Jordan; of course, he would have been only 12 years old.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Sports

A lot of things run through your head when you’re going in to relieve in a tight spot… one of them was, “Should I spike myself?”

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

I told her they must be all sold out.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Nobody but you and your caddie care what you do out there, and if your caddie is betting against you, he doesn't care, either.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

It's like an octopus falling out of a tree.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

The film looks suspiciously like the game itself.

(1923 – 2013) American professional football coach
Sports

The biggest liar in the world is the golfer who claims that he plays the game merely for exercise.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Beliefs Golf Honesty Lies Sports

He's not twins.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports