Subject: Sports (Page 19)

Some people think football is a matter of life and death… I can assure them it is much more serious than that.

Scottish football player & manager
Sports

If school had started at 4:00 in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Education School Sports

Football is all very well a good game for rough girls, but not for delicate boys.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Football Sports

Detroit’s so bad this year they might lose their bye week.

(1953 – ) comedian, political commentator and television & radio personality
Football Sports

If the Super Bowl is really the ultimate game, why do they play it again next year?

American football player
Football Sports

All of a sudden he’s hurt and I’ve got to get the popcorn out of my teeth.

American hockey player
Hockey Sports

Don’t park in the spaces marked, “Reserved for Umpires.”

professional baseball pitcher
Baseball Sports

I told one player, 'Son, I can't understand it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'

American basketball coach & executive
Basketball Intelligence

Sports is the toy department of human life, and Monday Night Football is the largest attraction in the toy department.

(1918 – 1995) American sports journalist & television commentator
Football Sports

It is the best sport in the world; it's got everything – speed and tough, ugly men.

Irish rugby player
Sports

The reason they call if ‘golf’ is that all the other four-letter words were used up.

Golf Sports

Yes, and so is everyone else in the league.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Baseball Sports

Impossible Lie: In golf, a ball that is in a position that is both completely obstructed by an immovable object and continuously observed by an incorruptible player.

Definitions Golf Sports

My biggest problem in the big leagues is that I can't figure out how to spend forty-three dollars in meal money.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

At 15 we put down my bag to hunt for a ball, found the ball, lost the bag.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

What’s one more torpedo in a sinking ship?

American football player
Football Health Sports

Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.

English former football player & manager
Misspokements Sports

To say a good defensive center is more important than a high-scoring forward is like saying that the intestinal tract is more vital than the circulatory system.

American basketball player
Basketball Sports

If bullshit was poetry, Ray 'Boom Boom' Mancini's name would be 'Shakespeare.'

boxing manager
Boxing Sports

Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.

playwright, performer, musician, screenwriter & humorist
Football Sports

The first guy who lays a finger on this blind old man is fined fifty bucks!

(1925 – 2005) American baseball player & manager
Baseball Sports