TV/Movie Quotes | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 61)

Or what, you port-brained twerp?! I’ve looked after you all my life! Even when we were babies, I had to show you which bit of your mother was serving the drinks!

Rowan Atkinson

(1955 – ) English actor

TV/Movie Quotes As Blackadder in “Blackadder”

This is what I spent all those years learning my ABDs for?

Christina Applegate

(1971 – ) American actress

Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes ABCs As Kelly Bundy in “Married With Children”

In a good shoe, I wear a size six, but a seven feels so good, I buy a size eight.

Dolly Parton

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress

TV/Movie Quotes As Truvy in “Steel Magnolias” Shoes

Woody: What’s up?
Norm: The warranty on my liver.

Norm

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor

Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes As Norm Peterson in “Cheers”

Colonel Blake: Hawkeye Pierce? I got a twix about you… says you stole a jeep up at Headquarters.
Hawkeye Pierce: No sir, no, I didn’t steal it. No, it’s right outside.

Donald Sutherland

(1935 – ) Canadian actor

TV/Movie Quotes As Hawkeye Pierce in the film “M*A*S*H”

Bart: Mornin’, ma’am. And isn’t it a lovely mornin’?
Elderly woman: Up yours, nigger.

Jessamine Milner

(1894 – 1983) American actress

TV/Movie Quotes As Elderly woman in “Blazing Saddles”

If God didn't want me to eat chicken in church, then he would have made gluttony a sin.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

TV/Movie Quotes Gluttony

Man: Mr. Melon, your wife was just showing us her Klimt [an Austrian painter].
Thornton Melon: You too, huh? She’s shown it to everybody.

Rodney Dangerfield

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

Art TV/Movie Quotes As Thornton Melon in “Back to School” Klimt

I really miss Phyllis. Of course, I never knew her very well. Maybe that helps.

Georgia Engel

(1948 – ) American actress

TV/Movie Quotes As Georgette Franklin in “The Mary Tyer Moore Show”

If you ever need someone to drink with, I’ll drink with you. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll drink with you. I guess what I’m trying to say is: I love to drink!

Megan Mullally

(1958 – ) American actress & singer

Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes As Karen Walker on “Will & Grace”

What’s the matter with you these days, M’Lynn? You got a reindeer up your butt?

Olympia Dukakis

(1931 – ) American actress

TV/Movie Quotes As Clairee Belcher in “Steel Magnolias”

For Michigan fans, football is a religion. And the Ohio State game is Easter.

John Ritter

(1948 – 2003) American actor

Football Sports TV/Movie Quotes As Paul Hennessy in 8 Simple Rules

[After a fight] Yeah, I’m fine. I snapped my chin down onto some guy’s fist and hit another one in the knee with my nose.

Woody Allen

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

Conflict Fights TV/Movie Quotes As Allan Felix From “Play It Again Sam”

She’s gone to Mexico for face-lifts so many times, I’ll bet if you whacked her head with a stick, prizes would fall out.

Megan Mullally

(1958 – ) American actress & singer

TV/Movie Quotes As Karen Walker on “Will & Grace” Face lifts Mexico

Raj: Isn’t there a policy against dating graduate students?
Leonard: No, if you can talk to them, you can ask them out.
Raj: Damn, there’s always a catch.

Kunal Nayyar

(1981 – ) Indian-English actor

TV/Movie Quotes As Raj in “The Big Bang Theory”

If women don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy.

Steve Smith

(1945 – ) Canadian comedian & actor

People TV/Movie Quotes Women As Red Green in “The Red Green Show”

U2 lead singer Bono met with President Bush at the White House this week. Bono urged the president to help the world’s poor; Bush urged Bono to get back with Cher.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes From Weekend Update on “Saturday Night Live” George W. Bush

Good Lord I can’t believe I’m at a public pool. Why doesn’t someone just directly pee on me?

Megan Mullally

(1958 – ) American actress & singer

TV/Movie Quotes As Karen Walker on “Will & Grace”

Dad, the odds of me knowing the score to the Mariners game is about the same as you knowing the score to Pacific Overtures.

Kelsey Grammer

(1955 – ) American actor, comedian, producer, director & singer

Self TV/Movie Quotes As Frasier Crane in “Frasier”

Getting married is like buying a new horse, or going into a strange saloon.

W.C. Fields

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Marriage TV/Movie Quotes As Larsen E. Whipsnade in “You Can’t Cheat an Honest Man”

Phyllis: I just thought I’d see what you swingin’ singles do for fun.
Rhoda: Same as you – sit around and wonder what it would be like to have a happy marriage.

Valerie Harper

(1939 – ) American actress

TV/Movie Quotes As Rhoda Morgenstern in “The Mary Tyer Moore Show”

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Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 61)

Or what, you port-brained twerp?! I’ve looked after you all my life! Even when we were babies, I had to show you which bit of your mother was serving the drinks!

This is what I spent all those years learning my ABDs for?

In a good shoe, I wear a size six, but a seven feels so good, I buy a size eight.

Woody: What’s up?
Norm: The warranty on my liver.

Colonel Blake: Hawkeye Pierce? I got a twix about you… says you stole a jeep up at Headquarters.
Hawkeye Pierce: No sir, no, I didn’t steal it. No, it’s right outside.

Bart: Mornin’, ma’am. And isn’t it a lovely mornin’?
Elderly woman: Up yours, nigger.

If God didn't want me to eat chicken in church, then he would have made gluttony a sin.

Man: Mr. Melon, your wife was just showing us her Klimt [an Austrian painter].
Thornton Melon: You too, huh? She’s shown it to everybody.

I really miss Phyllis. Of course, I never knew her very well. Maybe that helps.

If you ever need someone to drink with, I’ll drink with you. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll drink with you. I guess what I’m trying to say is: I love to drink!

What’s the matter with you these days, M’Lynn? You got a reindeer up your butt?

For Michigan fans, football is a religion. And the Ohio State game is Easter.

[After a fight] Yeah, I’m fine. I snapped my chin down onto some guy’s fist and hit another one in the knee with my nose.

She’s gone to Mexico for face-lifts so many times, I’ll bet if you whacked her head with a stick, prizes would fall out.

Raj: Isn’t there a policy against dating graduate students?
Leonard: No, if you can talk to them, you can ask them out.
Raj: Damn, there’s always a catch.

If women don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy.

U2 lead singer Bono met with President Bush at the White House this week. Bono urged the president to help the world’s poor; Bush urged Bono to get back with Cher.

Good Lord I can’t believe I’m at a public pool. Why doesn’t someone just directly pee on me?

Dad, the odds of me knowing the score to the Mariners game is about the same as you knowing the score to Pacific Overtures.

Getting married is like buying a new horse, or going into a strange saloon.

Phyllis: I just thought I’d see what you swingin’ singles do for fun.
Rhoda: Same as you – sit around and wonder what it would be like to have a happy marriage.