Author: Bill Maher Page 2

The whole dating ritual was different when I was a kid; girls got pinned, not nailed.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Age Dating Sex

Scooter Libby was found guilty of perjury, obstruction, and making false statements… or, as the White House calls it, a press conference.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Crime Government Law

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Beliefs Health

His [George Bush] popularity rating – his approval rating – with blacks: two percent… two percent… that is somewhere between Mark Fuhrman and sickle cell anemia.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Insults People Reviews/Criticism

In this country you’re guilty until proven wealthy.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
America Government Law Money Wealth

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Men People Women

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he’s the only one in the world who treats me like I’m The Beatles.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Animals Dogs

They’re talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that’s used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can’t even smoke in bed.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Insults

Why are there so many puritans in this country, and why can’t the rest of us make them go away?!

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Beliefs