Keyword: Fishing

There are only two occasions when Americans respect privacy, especially in presidents; those are prayer and fishing.

(1929 – 1933) 31st U.S. president, humanitarian

Anglers think they are divining some primeval natural force by outwitting a fish, a creature that never even got out of the evolutionary starting gate.

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician

It is to be observed that ‘angling’ is the name given to fishing by people who can’t fish.

(1869 – 1944) Canadian economist & humorist

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Don’t teach a man to fish… and feed yourself. He’s a grown man. And fishing’s not that hard.

(1970 – ) American actor, writer & carpenter

I would like to go fishing and catch a fishstick… that would be convenient.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

On fishing shows they always throw the fish back; they don’t want to eat them, they just want to make them late for something.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

Fishing: A venerable contest in which modern man pits his intelligence and technology against the native wit of primitive aquatic vertebrates, and generally finishes second.

Fishing relaxes me. It’s like yoga, except I still get to kill something.

(1970 – ) American actor, writer & carpenter

Fishing: A delusion entirely surrounded by liars in old clothes.

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d be a shortage of fishing poles.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist

Exaggeration: Formal term for a collection of fishermen (i.e. an exaggeration of anglers).

Fishing: A jerk at one end of the line waiting for a jerk at the other end.

You give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, but you teach a man to fish and you’ve saved yourself a fish haven’t you?”

(1968 – ) English comedian & actor

Advice to anglers: don't take advice from people with missing fingers.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)

Hook: Irritating but highly reliable device used to quickly locate the position of one’s thumb at the bottom of a tackle box.

Sinker: Lead weight attached to the end of a length of fishing line to facilitate the speedy disposal of unwanted lures.

You might be a redneck if… you've ever been too drunk to fish.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

Nothing makes a fish bigger than almost being caught.

They should call fishing what it really is… tricking and killing!

(1973 – ) American comedian

Give a man a fish and he has food for a day; teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him forf the entire weekend.


Angler: A man who spends rainy days sitting around on the muddy banks of rivers doing nothing because his wife won’t let him do it at home.