Subject: Problems (Page 3)

To err is dysfunctional, to forgive co-dependent.

(1953 – ) American musician
Mistakes Problems

In this world there are only two tragedies: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Problems

1. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on the weekend. 2. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on a trip. 3. Nothing minor ever happens to a car.

Autos Murphy’s Laws Problems

I learned in my car that I could not have children; it was the day that I locked my keys in my car with the engine running.

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Autos Children Family Mistakes Problems

Yesterday I accidentally hit a little kid with my car; it wasn’t serious – nobody saw me.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Accidents Problems

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Failure Friends Old People Success

I am one of those people who just can’t help getting a kick out of life – even when it’s a kick in the teeth.

(1900 – 1962) Russian – Jewish madam & author
Emotions Happiness Life Problems

This island is mainly made of coal and surrounded by fish; only an organizing genius could produce a shortage of coal and fish at the same time.

(1897 – 1960) Welsh labor leader & politician
Places Problems

When all else fails, play dead.

(1945 – ) Canadian comedian & actor
Problems TV/Movie Quotes

However much a shower control may rotate, the degree of rotation required to change from ice-cold to scalding is never more than one millimeter.

(1957 – ) New Zealand writer
Murphy’s Laws Problems

That’s one of the remarkable things about life… it’s never so bad that it can’t get worse.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Life Problems

The most dangerous strategy is to jump a chasm in two leaps.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Failure Problems Situations

Those who don’t study the past will repeat its errors; those who do study it will find OTHER ways to err.

Murphy’s Laws Past People Problems

Any bus that can be the wrong bus will be the wrong bus. All others are out of service or full.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If the assumptions are wrong, the conclusions aren't likely to be very good.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

To the man who only has a hammer, every problem starts looking like a nail.

(1908 – 1970) American professor of psychology
Problems

There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the center of a very large tree.

Golf Murphy’s Laws Problems Sports

Specialists are people who always repeat the same mistakes.

(1883 – 1969) German architect & founder of the Bauhaus School
Mistakes People Problems

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

(1920 – ) Hungarian writer
Problems

A conference is just an admission that you want somebody to join you in your troubles.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
People Problems