Subject: Communication (Page 52)

Diplomacy: To do and say the nastiest thing in the nicest way. 

(1887 – 1938) American journalist, author, editor & lecturer
Characteristics Communication

When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste; when I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.

(1972 – ) Anglo-Irish comedian, writer & actor
Communication Wordplay

Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.

Communication

No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why.

(1913 – 1983) journalist & author
Communication People

Everything comes to him who waits… except a loaned book.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Characteristics Communication

It takes a real talent to be able to apologize in a manner that makes the offended person feel guilty.

Characteristics Communication

No matter which book you need, it's on the bottom shelf.

Books Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

If writers were good businessmen, they'd have too much sense to be writers.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Money Reading/Writing

All of ‘em, any of ‘em that have been in front of me over all these years.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Communication Misspokements

To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Books Communication Reading/Writing

Is it possible to mistake schizophrenia for telepathy, I hear you ask.

comedian
Health Wordplay

We’ve heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.

(1951 – 2013) American professor & artificial intelligence expert
Communication Reading/Writing

Writing is easy. You just open a vein and bleed.

(1905–1982) American sportswriter
Communication Reading/Writing

I usually get my stuff from people who promised somebody else that they would keep it a secret.

(1897 – 1972) broadcast journalist & gossip columnist
Communication Speech

At the all-you-can-eat barbecue, you have to pay the regular dinner price if you eat less than you can.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Food/Drink Wordplay

Journalism is the ability to meet the challenge of filling space.

(1892 – 1983) British author, journalist, literary critic & travel writer
Communication Reading/Writing

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

I do all my writing in bed; everybody knows I do my best work there.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Places Reading/Writing

I don’t talk during sex ‘cause it’s embarrassing and it might wake her up.

stand-up comedian & writer
Communication Sex Speech

If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?


Communication Reading/Writing

The person who writes for fools is always sure of a large audience.

(1788 – 1860) German philosopher
Communication Reading/Writing