Subject: Communication » Wordplay (Page 3)

Parenthood: Feeding the mouth that bites you.

Sewing Circle: Where friendship hangs by a thread.

Judge: A man in a trying position.

Just seen the grave of the woman from My Fair Lady… it says ‘Here lies a Doolittle’.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian

“Pickup artists” and “garbagemen” should switch names.

Love: Woman’s eternal spring and man’s eternal fall.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist

Accordionated: Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time.

Anatomy: The belly of a very small insect.

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as ‘4’s’?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

I’m good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet… I don’t know why.

British comedian

A day without sunshine is like, you know… night.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician

I once knew a woman who offered her honor, so I honored her offer, and all night long I was on her and off her.

Farmer: A man who is outstanding in his field.

My wife says I’m unsophisticated and uncultured, so to prove her wrong, guess where I’m taking her… hint: It starts with “B” and rhymes with “wallet.”

If I repeatedly stab my cornflakes does that make me a cereal killer?

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Announce: Thirty grams or a sixteenth of a pound.

Avoid fruit and nuts; you are what you eat.

(1945 –) American cartoonist (Garfield)

Teetotaler: One who abstains from strong drink, sometimes totally, sometimes tolerably totally.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

I had a job drilling holes for water… it was well, boring.


I went to a Pretenders gig; it was a tribute act.

(1967 – ) English actor, writer & comedian

Heir Fare: Executor’s fee.