Subject: Conflict (Page 13)

You can build a throne with bayonets, but it’s difficult to sit on it.


Conflict War

If you are going to tell people the truth, be funny or they will kill you.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Communication Honesty Killing Truth

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night… and reduce the crime rate.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Appearance Conflict Crime People Self Ugly

Never go to bed mad… stay up and fight.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Activities Conflict Fights Marriage Sleep

Here’s how easy it was to get away with bank robbery back in the ‘30s… as long as you weren’t still there when the police arrived, you had a 99% change of getting away with it.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Conflict Crime

The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm bears.

(1972 – ) English standup comedian, writer & actor
Animals Arms Government Things

I haven't committed a crime; what I did was fail to comply with the law.

(1927 – ) American mayor (New York City)
Crime Misspokements

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate; and I can picture us attacking that world, because they’d never expect it.

Conflict War

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Conflict Emotions Love Time War

If people were forced to eat what they killed, there would be no more wars.

(1936 – 1989) American social & political activist
Conflict Eating Killing People War

Guns don't kill people; it's those bullets ripping through the body.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
Arms Conflict Death

An Iranian moderate is one that has run out of ammunition.

(1923 – ) German-born diplomat & scholar
Arms Conflict Government People Places

I’m not a fighter; I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Autos Conflict Fights Things

Scooter Libby was found guilty of perjury, obstruction, and making false statements… or, as the White House calls it, a press conference.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Crime Government Law

The surest way to become a pacifist is to join the infantry.

(1921 – 2003) American editorial cartoonist
Conflict Government Military War

Gun-free zones kill people

Arms Conflict Headlines

I got up the other day and everything in my apartment was stolen and replaced with an exact replica.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Conflict Crime Things

I look at fighting the same way I look at physics; I can’t do it, but I respect its ability to solve problems.

comedian
Conflict Fights

In a war of ideas it is people who get killed.

(1909 – 1966) Polish poet, writer & aphorist
Conflict Ideas Intelligence War

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me; I said, “Well, what do you need?”

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Arms Canada Places Things

The Falklands incident was a quarrel between two bald men over a comb.

(1899 – 1986) Argentine writer, essayist, poet & translator
Conflict War