Subject: Death (Page 26)

Turn me.  I am roasted on one side.

(c.225 – 258) a deacon & celebrated Roman martyr
Last words

It must have been the coffee.

(1917 – 1979) Japanese-American actor
Last words

I’m afraid I’m being an awful nuisance.

(1887 – 1964) English biographer, critic, novelist & poet
Death Last words

They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!

(1813 – 1864) American teacher & Union Army general in the Civil War
Death Government Military

Marriage can be viewed as the waiting room for death.

(1963 – ) Canadian comedian, actor, screenwriter & film producer
Death Marriage

For me dying is a lot like going camping… I don't want to do it.


Death

Surveys show that the #1 fear of Americans is public speaking. #2 is death. Death is #2. That means that at a funeral, the average American would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Death TV/Movie Quotes

Okay, Father. I'll pray that you don't follow me too soon.

(1920 – 1945) only American soldier to be court martialed and executed for desertion during World War II
Last words

I hope they bury me near a straight man.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Death Emotions

I'm tired of fighting! I guess this thing is going to get me.

born Erik Weisz (1874 – 1926) Hungarian-born American magician, stunt performer & escape artist
Last words

Life is pleasant, death is peaceful; it’s the transition that’s troublesome.

(1920 – 1992) American science and science fiction author & professor
Death Life

One never knows the ending. One has to die to know exactly what happens after death… although Catholics have their hopes.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer
Last words

I went to a funeral recently, and they handed out Kleenex before the funeral – which I thought was cocky.

(1978 – ) American comedian & writer
Death

I’ll be in Hell before you start breakfast! Let her rip!

(1863 – 1901) American cowboy & train robber
Last words

Show my head to the people.  It is worth seeing.

(1759 – 1794) influential figure in the French Revolution
Last words

Our sympathy is extended to Samuel Austin, whose mother pasted away.

Church Bulletins Death

Don't be in such a hurry.

(1915 – 1959) American jazz singer & songwriter
Last words

Luna: So then, what do you believe in?

Miles: Sex and death – two things that come once in a lifetime… but at least after death, you're not nauseous.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Sex TV/Movie Quotes

There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say.

(1903 – 1974) English intellectual, literary critic & writer
Beliefs Death Opinion

Guns don't kill people; it's those bullets ripping through the body.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
Arms Conflict Death

I am off in search of the great perhaps.

(c.1494 – 1553) French Renaissance writer, doctor, monk & Greek scholar
Last words