Subject: Emotions (Page 13)

The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person.

(1962 – ) writer & journalist
Emotions Individuals Love People

My wife put a mirror over our bed; she says she likes to watch herself laugh.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Emotions Laughter Sex

People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
Emotions People Self

Most of the time I don’t have much fun; the rest of the time I don’t have any fun at all.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Emotions Self

Many a man who falls in love with a dimple make the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Emotions Love Marriage

Sympathy: What one usually gives to a friend or relative when he doesn’t want to lend him money.

Definitions Emotions

Worry: Interest paid on trouble before it falls due.

Definitions Emotions

My uncle Sammy was an angry man… he had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?

stand-up comedian, actor, writer & producer
Anger Emotions

Money is not the most important thing in the world, love is… fortunately, I love money.

(1934 – ) comedian
Emotions Love Money

What pleases men most is old wine and young women.

(c. 484 BC – c. 425 BC) Greek historian
Emotions Happiness Men People Women

Absence does not make the heart grow fonder, but it sure heats up the blood.

(1939 – ) American actress
Emotions

Love: Two minds without a single thought.

(1896 – 1949) American dramatist
Emotions Love

Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad.

Emotions Intelligence Laughter

Racism is so stupid; there’s more than enough reasons to dislike people on an individual basis.

(1952 – ) American political satirist
Emotions People

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn’t understand math.

(1978 – ) American comedian & writer
Emotions Love Money People Women

Personally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Alcohol Emotions Food/Drink

I’m Mad as Hell, but mostly in a Passive Aggressive Way!

Anger Emotions

I fear no man, but the dentist.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Emotions Fear Sports

Creator: a comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Emotions Laughter

I can’t do two things at once; I can’t have intercourse and enjoy myself at the same time.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions Happiness

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!

(1928 – ) humorist, singer, songwriter & satirist
Emotions People