Subject: Emotions (Page 9)

Are you so unobservant that you do not yet realize that sanity and happiness are an impossible combination?

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

I’m not only Iranian, I’m also Jewish, and I know what you’re thinking… you’re thinking, ‘Wow, he’s Iranian and Jewish; I don’t know if I should hate him or hate him.’

American standup-comedian

Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.

(1917 – 1993) British composer & novelist

Not with anybody else.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion

Delusions of grandeur make me feel a lot better about myself.

(1935 – ) screenwriter, author, director & producer

The voice of love seemed to call me… but it was a wrong number.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist

There are moments when everything goes well, but don’t be frightened.

(1864 – 1910) French author

It’s weird to hear a girl laugh when I’m not making love to her.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor

They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian; well, they’re not laughing now.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer

Marriage is a triumph of habit over hate.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor

I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.

(1978 – ) American actress, writer & comedian

A man in love is like a clipped coupon… it's time to cash in.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

My uncle Sammy was an angry man… he had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?

stand-up comedian, actor, writer & producer

Money can't buy happiness; it can, however, rent it.

Modesty in an actor is as fake as passion in a call girl.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian

A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never ceased to be amused.

(1934 – ) American actress, dancer, activist & author

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!

(1928 – ) humorist, singer, songwriter & satirist

To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist

Once a woman has given you her heart you can never get rid of the rest of her body.

(1664 – 1726) English architect & dramatist

We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

There’s nothing to fear but life itself.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor