Subject: Entertainment (Page 18)

Nowadays, the perfect crime is getting caught and then selling your story to TV.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Conflict Crime Entertainment Television

Critics can’t even make music by rubbing their back legs together.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Entertainment

There's no business like show business… but there are several businesses like accounting.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Entertainment Occupations Work

He had delusions of adequacy.

(1913 – 1996) writer & Broadway theater critic
Acting Reviews/Criticism

The number of people who will not go to a show they do not want to see is unlimited.

(1895 – 1960) American lyricist
Entertainment

We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days still had many of their original teeth.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Age Entertainment Health Music

It's bad when they don't perform your operas – but when they do, it's far worse.

(1835 – 1921) French Late-Romantic composer, conductor & pianist
Entertainment Insults Music Situations

I went to a record store and asked for 50 Cent; they kicked me out for pan-handling.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comic
Entertainment Music

The only part I believed was at the end of the movie when she wouldn't move her ass over and let him on the raft with her.

(1960 – ) American stand-up comedian & writer
Entertainment Film

Accordian: An instrument inharmony with the sentiments of an assassin.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Entertainment Music

It used to be that we in films were the lowest form of art; now we have something to look down on.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Entertainment Television

If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the stairs; if you want to make comedy writers laugh, you push an actual old lady down the stairs.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Emotions Entertainment Laughter

The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, don't make us better people and don't come in clearly enough.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Entertainment Sex Television

The English may not like music, but they absolutely love the noise it makes.

(1879 – 1961) English conductor
Entertainment Music People Places

Wet she’s a star; dry she ain’t.

(1891 – 1951) comedian, singer, theater & film actress
Acting Reviews/Criticism

If there are only two shows worth watching, they will be on at the same time.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

Dancing with her was like moving a piano.

(1885 – 1933) columnist & writer
Activities Dance Insults

Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.

(1897 – 1972) broadcast journalist & gossip columnist
Entertainment Film Hollywood Places

After conducting a concert in a small town, I once received the following note from a farmer who had attended the performance: “Dear Sir, I wish to inform you that the man who played the long thing you pull in and out only did so during the brief periods you were looking at him.”

(1867 – 1957) Italian conductor
Entertainment Music

Every child is an artist; the problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up.

(1881 – 1973) Spanish painter, sculptor, printmaker & stage designer
Art Children Entertainment

Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Entertainment