Subject: Insults (Page 36)

Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth, and Reagan couldn't tell the difference.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Characteristics Honesty Insults Lies

Need to tie some kerosene rags around his ankles so the ants don’t eat his candy ass.

American auto racer
Auto racing Insults Sports

He was distinguished for ignorance; for he had only one idea and that was wrong.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Ideas Insults Intelligence

Tell me the story of that frock Judy, it's obviously an old favorite; you were wise to remove the curtain rings.

(1934 – ) Australian comedian, satirist, artist, & author
Insults

I once dated a guy so dumb he could not count to 21 unless he was naked.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Insults Intelligence Stupidity

Bambi with testosterone.

(1959 – ) film critic
Insults

A day away from Tallulah is like a month in the country.

(1896 – 1983) American actor
Insults

Gee, what a terrific party… later on we’ll get some fluid and embalm each other.

(1927 – 2018) playwright & screenwriter
Insults Situations

[businesman] Sir Martin Sorrell is more arrogant than the entire French nation put together.


businessman & CEO
Communication Insults

Before we make love, my husband takes a painkiller.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Husbands Insults Marriage Sex

He's so snobbish he has an unlisted zip-code.

(1907 – 1987) journalist & columnist
Insults

She’s so hairy – when she lifted up her arm I thought it was Tina Turner in her armpit.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Body Hair Insults

He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.

(1720 – 1777) British dramatist, actor & theatre manager
Communication Insults

He looks and talks like he just fell off Edgar Bergen's lap.

(1942 – ) Canadian comedian, actor, writer, director & author
Insults

To hear Alice Keppel talk about her escape from france, one would think had swum the Channel, with her maid between her teeth.

Insults

It's a pity you didn't have a little more brandy; it might have made you more agreeable!

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Insults

She speaks five languages and can't act in any of them.

(1904 – 2000) English actor, director & producer
Acting Entertainment Insults

She may very well pass for forty three… in the dusk with the light behind her.

(1836 – 1911) English dramatist, librettist, poet & illustrator
Age Insults

He has so many fish hooks in his nose, he looks like a piece of bait.

(1952 – ) American sportscaster
Appearance Insults

Sleeping with George Michael would be like having sex with a groundhog.

George Alan O'Dowd (1961 – ) British singer-songwriter
Insults Sex

As a simple countryman, he distrusted the use of money and, finding barter cumbersome, preferred to steal.

(1941 – 2008) British journalist, musician &broadcaster
Insults