Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, proverbs, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Marriage
(Page 36)
Alimony: The screwing you get for the screwing you got.
Anonymous
Definitions
Marriage
Alimony
Divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.
Robin Williams
(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Divorce
Marriage
Money
Alimony
Latin
Marriage is like a train that makes intermittent stops at children, new house, new job, new car and cruises, just to keep the trip interesting.
Erma Bombeck
(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Marriage
You know the honeymoon's over when your dog brings your slippers, and your wife barks at you!
Alfred E. Neuman
fictional mascot and cover boy of
Mad
, an American humor magazine
Marriage
Honeymoons
You know… there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… husband!
Bill Maher
(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Husbands
Marriage
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