Subject: People (Page 27)

I'm always into a positive black image. Whenever Leon Spinks fights I always pray, 'Dear Lord, please don't let them interview Leon on TV.'

American television personality
Boxing People Sports

Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for it.

Conflict Crime People

Testosterone: Hormone which causes facial hair, muscularity, a deep voice, speeding tickets, the desire to watch professional wrestling, Arnold Shwarzenegger movies, war, fist fights, and the need to purchase cocktails for women with names like “Boom Boom. ”

Definitions Men

If you're gonna see a play about slavery, it's important that you watch it with your white friends because you know they're gonna pick up dinner that night.

American stand-up comedian
Entertainment People

My girlfriend was no bargain either; she used to braid her armpits.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Girlfriends Hair People Ugly

God is good to the Irish, but no one else is, not even the Irish.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
People Places

During the feminist seventies men were caught between a rock and a hard-on; in the fathering eighties they are caught between good hugs and bad hugs.

(1936 – ) novelist, essayist & columnist
Conflict Men Past Women

People don't change; they only become more so.

Murphy’s Laws People

People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Fools Intelligence People

Only adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.

Health Murphy’s Laws People

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders… I hate necks.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Body Communication People Women Wordplay

If you want to offend terrorists, if you’re a woman, wear a dress, and if you're a man, wear a dress.

British-Asian comedian
People

Vegetarian: A good salad citizen.

Food/Drink People

In elementary school, I made an ashtray for Dad… it caught fire.

(1955 – ) American actor, comedian, producer, director & singer
Self TV/Movie Quotes

My boyfriend's kids are half-Swedish, half-Norwegian: "They're see-through."

American stand-up comedian, television writer & actor
Characteristics People Places

Some people can stay longer in an hour than others can in a week.

(1837 – 1920) American author
Insults People Relationships Time

I just got dumped recently, but I'm alright with it ‘cause we weren’t a good match… you know – I’m a Gemini… she was a whore.

American comedian & musician
Girlfriends Relationships

I learned in business that you had to be very careful when you told somebody that’s working for you to do something, because the chances were very high he’d do it; in government, you don’t have to worry about that.

(1920 – ) U.S. Secretary of State economist, statesman & businessman
Characteristics Government Occupations People Work

The natural man has only two primal passions, to get and beget.

(1849 – 1919) Canadian physician
People

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)
Characteristics Failure Intelligence Mistakes People

The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball People Sports