Subject: Problems (Page 20)

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Marriage Mistakes

It's not easy taking my problems one at a time when they refuse to get in line.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Problems

A conference is just an admission that you want somebody to join you in your troubles.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
People Problems

There is always one more bug.

Computers Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

One cannot make an omelette without breaking eggs… but it is amazing how many eggs one can break without making a decent omelette.

(1916 – 2000) Egyptian-American academic economist & historian
Failure Problems Situations

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Failure Success

New York is the only city in the world where you can get deliberately run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian.

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
Accidents New York City People Places Problems

If your project doesn't work, look for the part you didn't think was important.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

We still… cannot catch Osama bin Laden, but we nailed Martha Stewart's ass to the wall.

(1964 – ) American comedian & actor
Failure Government Law People

If your action has a 50% possibility of being correct, you will be wrong 75% of the time.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.

Problems

Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)
Characteristics Failure Intelligence Mistakes People

Experience: The name an older man gives to his mistakes.

Definitions Mistakes

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Fools Intelligence Mistakes People Problems

Men still die with their boots on, but usually one boot is on the accelerator.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Accidents Autos Clothing Death Problems

No matter how long it takes for you to get back to pick up the shoes the shoemaker will tell you that they won't be ready until tomorrow.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

Never saw off the branch you are on, unless you are being hanged from it.

(1909 – 1966) Polish poet, writer & aphorist
Problems Situations

The last person who quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong – until the next person quits or is fired.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Problems

Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.

Problems Proverbs

In this world there are winners and losers – and, of course, ‘the others’, who comprise the majority.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Failure People Success