Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 8)

As an intellectual, he bestowed upon the games of golf and bridge all the enthusiasm and perseverance that he withheld from his books and ideas.

(1920 – 1982) foreign bureau chief, editor & speechwriter

I enjoy the oohs! and aahs! from the gallery when I hit my drives; but I'm getting pretty tired of the awws! and uhhs! when I miss the putt.

professional golfer

Very few blacks will take up golf until the requirement for plaid pants is dropped.

(1949 – ) American stand-up comedian

Golf is just a game – and an idiotic game most of the time.

American professional golfer

Too much ambition is a bad thing to have in a bunker.

American professional golfer

Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.

It looks like he has a divot over each ear.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator

Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good, unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off. 


(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist

Go ahead and putt, you are not interrupting my conversation. 


The woods are full of long drivers.

American golf professional & coach

Your best golf shots always occur when playing alone.

I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart.

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor

While playing golf today I hit two good balls… I stepped on a rake.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian

I just stood there watching him walk past and thinking, ‘I don’t know what that is, but I know there weren’t two of them on Noah’s Ark.’

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.

(1918 – ) American Christian evangelist

Isn't it great to live in a society where the penalty for lying to a congressman can be up to 30 years in jail, but the penalty for a congressman lying to you is another two years in office.

(1955 – ) American sportswriter

Show me a man with a great golf game, and I’ll show you a man who has been neglecting something.

(1917 – 1963) 35th U.S. president

I played golf with a priest the other day. He shot par-par-par-par-par. Finally I said to him, "Father, if you're playing golf like this you haven't been saving many souls lately.”

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer

One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball.

(1926 – ) professional bowler

The Royal Hong Kong Club caddies hit the nail on the head; their term for golf – "Hittee ball, say damn."

It's so bad I could putt off a tabletop and still leave the ball halfway down the leg.

professional golfer