Subject: Sports (Page 15)

What’s the toughest thing in a professional football game? … Its being the mother of the quarterback.

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer
Family Football Mothers Sports

The question looming over Magri, is not will he keep the title, but can he?

British sports commentator
Boxing Misspokements Sports

The rest of the field.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft; today it’s called golf.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Golf Sports

He looks up at him through blood smeared lips.

British sports commentator
Boxing Misspokements Sports

Frank Bruno has a chin of such pure Waterford crystal; it gives rise to the old adage that people who live in glass jaws shouldn't throw punches. The biggest danger in fighting Bruno is that you might get hit by flying glass.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Boxing Sports

Swimming isn’t a sport; it’s just a way to keep from drowning.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Activities Sports

The bus leaves in an hour – anyone who needs a shower, take one.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

Washington: first in war, first in peace, and last in the American League.

(1860 – 1931) American baseball writer & humorist
Baseball Sports

Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.

playwright, performer, musician, screenwriter & humorist
Football Sports

For those who know golf, no explanation is necessary. For those who don't, no explanation is possible.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Golf Sports

If Mike Tyson gets any better, he’ll be hitting Lou Rawls while he sings the National Anthem.

American television personality
Boxing Sports

We've got a problem here. Luis Tiant wants to use the bathroom, and it says no foreign objects in the toilets.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

It looks like he has a divot over each ear.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

The trial began in Lake Charles, Louisiana of a jockey accused of hiding his horse in dense fog to win a race at Evangeline Downs.

Sports

I was thinking of running a marathon, but I think it might be too difficult getting all the roads closed and providing enough water for everyone.

comedian
Activities Sports

You win some, you lose some, you wreck some.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

You can't see a digital clock because there isn't one.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

Baseball is a game where a curve is an optical illusion, a screwball can be a pitch or a person, stealing is legal and you can spit anywhere you like except in the umpire's eye or on the ball.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Baseball Sports

I call Los Angeles the city of alternatives. If you don't like mountains, we got the ocean. If you don't like Knott's Berry Farm, we've got Disneyland. If you don't like basketball, we've got the Clippers.

American television personality
Basketball Sports

Frank Leahy was here [Notre Dame] for three years and went to war; I think sometimes that would be a welcome relief to get away from the pressures.

(1937 – ) football coach, sportscaster, author & speaker
Football Sports