Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 4)

Waitress: And another thing, don’t be so free with your hands.
Fields: Listen honey. I was only trying to guess your weight.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

Lady Godiva put everything she had on a horse.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

The presidential race continued to tighten up – in fact, according to some polls, John McCain is only 6 points behind Sarah Palin.

(1971 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Elections/Voting TV/Movie Quotes

I thought that "Roman candles" just meant that they were imported. You know, from Romany.

(1971 – ) American actress
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Uhh. It smells like a skunk that came out of the ass of another skunk.

(1957 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & screenwriter
TV/Movie Quotes

He's trying to hypnotize me, and it's not in that good Las Vegas kind of way.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

George: I should get to sleep with Elaine. That’s the only way to punish you.

Jerry: That doesn’t punish me. That punishes Elaine.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
TV/Movie Quotes

I didn’t hate my mother; it was an accident!

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor
Mothers TV/Movie Quotes

Why y’all duded up lookin’ like Errol Slim?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Never play in a rigged game, unless you rig it yourself.

(1928 – 2014) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Karen, I am a lawyer, which means, unlike you, I actually passed a bar.

(1963 – ) Canadian-American actor
Lawyers TV/Movie Quotes

My grandfather’s great… he’s a great-grandfather.

(1887 – 1961) comedian, actor & member of the Marx Brothers
TV/Movie Quotes

I’d give that picture a Japanese Academy Reward!

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Lou: Put it on an idiot card for Ted.

Ted: Cue cards, Lou. I don’t know why everyone insists on calling cue cards idiot cards.

Murray: We just have trouble thinking of you as a cue.

(1931 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Marie: Who keeps pornography for twenty-nine years?

Frank: Anyone married to you.

(1935 – 2006) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Lemon merinj pie.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Eddie: Well, darling, she’s been low recently.

Saffie: Low? She’d get vertigo in a sewer.


TV/Movie Quotes

There are three acceptable haircuts: high and tight, crew cut, buzz cut.

(1970 – ) American actor, writer & carpenter
Appearance Hair TV/Movie Quotes

So I was jealous of her [her sister] when she was fourteen and I was nineteen. I’m sure it’ll be different now that we’re both thirty-five.

1922) American actress, comedian & television personality
Age TV/Movie Quotes

If that ain’t the black calling the kettle pot!

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Do you travel as one person or do you get a party rate of ten?

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Appearance Fat TV/Movie Quotes