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Average Person: One who thinks someone else is the average person.

Definitions People

She grabbed the bull by the tail and faced the problem squarely.

Mixed metaphors

As long as that dog hunts, we’ll ride him,

Mixed metaphors

Youth: That brief period, as distinguished from childhood or middle age, when the sexes talk to each other at a party.

Age Definitions People Young

Hey, I hope you can help me, I’m kind of up against the gun here.

Mixed metaphors

 “I’m just going to put these handcuffs on you,” said Tom manically.

Tom Swifties

Forger: The man who gives a check a bad name.

Definitions

“That certainly took the wind out of my sails!” said Tom disgustedly.

Tom Swifties

Between closed walls

Mixed metaphors

The ship of state has a difficult road ahead.

Mixed metaphors

Heir Fare: Executor’s fee.

Definitions Wordplay

Vision: Looking farther than you can see.

Definitions Intelligence Thinking

The most dangerous killer in the animals of crime.

Malaprops

I haven’t seen him for donkey’s ears!

Malaprops

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

Situations Time

The Three Ages of Marriage: Twenty is when you watch the TV after; Forty is when you watch the TV during; Sixty is when you watch the TV instead.

Entertainment Marriage Sex Television

They burnt the midnight candle to resolve the issues.

Mixed metaphors

“This flower’s empty,” the drone said belatedly.

Tom Swifties

Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

Miscellaneous

Social Diseases: Germs of endearment.

Definitions

Honeymoon: The vacation a man takes before starting to work for a new boss.

Definitions Marriage