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Subject: Entertainment » Music (Page 5)

I liked your opera… I think I will set it to music.

Ludwig van Beethoven

(1770 – 1827) German composer & pianist

Jack Benny would end his act by playing a tune on his violin, so naturally he got a big cheer when he finished.

George Burns

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Entertainment Music Applause Jack Benny Violin

The bagpipes sound exactly the same when you have finished learning them as when you start.

Thomas Beecham

(1879 – 1961) English conductor

Entertainment Music Bagpipes Sound

Piano: A parlor utensil for subduing the impertinent visitor. It is operated by depressing the keys of the machine and the spirits of the audience.

Ambrose Bierce

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Definitions Entertainment Music Things Piano

I am playing all the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order.

Eric Morecambe

(1926 – 1984) English comedian

Entertainment Music Notes

Tonight I’m going to listen with my ears.

Eugene Ormandy

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist

Entertainment Misspokements Music Listening

After conducting a concert in a small town, I once received the following note from a farmer who had attended the performance: “Dear Sir, I wish to inform you that the man who played the long thing you pull in and out only did so during the brief periods you were looking at him.

Arturo Toscanini

(1867 – 1957) Italian conductor

Entertainment Music

Violinist: A high-strung musician.

Anonymous

Definitions Entertainment Music Wordplay Violinist

Composers shouldn't think too much—it interferes with their plagiarism.

Howard Dietz

(1896 – 1983) American actor

Communication Entertainment Music Reading/Writing Composers Plagiarism

Jazz: Music invented by demons for the torture of imbeciles.

Henry van Dyke

(1852 – 1933) author, educator & clergyman

Entertainment Fools Intelligence Music Jazz Torture

Play us a medley of your hit.

Oscar Levant

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor

Entertainment Insults Music To George Gershwin

Director: The one who always faces the music.

Anonymous

Definitions Music Director

Accordion: An instrument whose music is long drawn out.

Anonymous

Definitions Entertainment Music Things Accordion

If he’d been making shell cases during the war it might have been better for music.

Charles-Camille Saint-Saëns

(1835 – 1921) French Late-Romantic composer, conductor & pianist

Entertainment Insults Music On composer Maurice Ravel

I love Wagner, but the music I prefer is that of a cat hung up by its tail outside a window and trying to stick to the panes of glass with its claws.

Charles Baudelaire

(1821 – 1867) French poet, essayist & art critic

Animals Cats Insults Music On composer Richard Wagner

The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.

Victor Borge

(1909 – 2000) Danish-born comedian & pianist

Entertainment Music Things Instruments Violas Violins

If love was easy, there would be almost no music.

Jake Johannsen

(1960 – ) American comedian

Emotions Love Music

Harp: A piano in the nude.

Anonymous

Definitions Entertainment Music Things Harp

If it wasn't for white people, who would play lead guitar?

Marsha Warfield

(1954 – ) American actress & comedian

Entertainment Music People Guitar

I opened the door for a lot of people, and they just ran through and left me holding the knob.

Bo Diddley

(1928 – 2008) American singer, songwriter & rock and roll pioneer

Entertainment Music Situations

If you can imagine a man having a vasectomy without anesthetic to the sound of frantic sitar playing, you will have some idea of what popular Turkish music is like.

Bill Bryson

American author

Entertainment Music Places Turkey

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Subject: Entertainment » Music (Page 5)

I liked your opera… I think I will set it to music.

Jack Benny would end his act by playing a tune on his violin, so naturally he got a big cheer when he finished.

The bagpipes sound exactly the same when you have finished learning them as when you start.

Piano: A parlor utensil for subduing the impertinent visitor. It is operated by depressing the keys of the machine and the spirits of the audience.

I am playing all the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order.

Tonight I’m going to listen with my ears.

After conducting a concert in a small town, I once received the following note from a farmer who had attended the performance: “Dear Sir, I wish to inform you that the man who played the long thing you pull in and out only did so during the brief periods you were looking at him.

Violinist: A high-strung musician.

Composers shouldn't think too much—it interferes with their plagiarism.

Jazz: Music invented by demons for the torture of imbeciles.

Play us a medley of your hit.

Director: The one who always faces the music.

Accordion: An instrument whose music is long drawn out.

If he’d been making shell cases during the war it might have been better for music.

I love Wagner, but the music I prefer is that of a cat hung up by its tail outside a window and trying to stick to the panes of glass with its claws.

The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.

If love was easy, there would be almost no music.

Harp: A piano in the nude.

If it wasn't for white people, who would play lead guitar?

I opened the door for a lot of people, and they just ran through and left me holding the knob.

If you can imagine a man having a vasectomy without anesthetic to the sound of frantic sitar playing, you will have some idea of what popular Turkish music is like.