Subject: Government » President

I love Barack Obama because when I go to Europe I don’t have to pretend to be Canadian any more.

(1967 – ) is an American comedian & actor

It's not that I disagree with Bush's economic policy or his foreign policy, it's that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth.

(1961 – 1994) comedian

The Democrats have an answer to the unemployment problem; they're all running for the presidency.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

I don't want to elect anyone stupid enough to want the job.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist

We have the greatest democracy in the world; of course, you don't have to win the election to become president, but don't nitpick this to death, alright?

(1953 – ) American comedian & writer

This President is going to lead us out of this recovery.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician

Presidents don’t do it to their wives; they do it to their country.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

I've been in the Bible every day since I've been the president.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president

I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president

Anybody that wants the presidency so much that he’ll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.

(1929 – ) journalist, author & television pundit

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

(1925 – 2005) television host

Dan Quayle deserves to be Vice President like Elvis deserved his black belt in karate.

(1953 – ) comedian, political commentator and television & radio personality

I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered together at the White House – with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone.

(1917 – 1963) 35th U.S. president

In America any boy may become President and I suppose it's just one of the risks he takes.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician

I was asked to name all the presidents… I thought they already had names.

(1973 – ) American comedian

All other things being equal, a bald man cannot be elected President of the United States.

Astronomers have discovered two giant new solar systems, and with George W. Bush taking over the Presidency, it’s good to know we have options.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright

Do you realize we’re only a heart attack away from Bush being president?

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor

I heard Dennis Kucinich say in a debate, 'When I'm president… and I just wanted to stop him and say, 'Dude.'

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian

Republicans elect stupid leaders with brilliant staffs and Democrats produce brilliant presidents with stupid staffs.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host

Often times people ask me, 'Why is it that you're so focused on helping the hungry and diseased in strange parts of the world?'

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president

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