Author: George Jean Nathan

Abstainer: The kind of man you wouldn’t want to drink with even if he did.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

I always said that I'd like Barrymore's acting till the cows came home. Well, ladies and gentleman, last night the cows came home.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

Love is an emotion experienced by the many and enjoyed by the few.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

He writes his plays for the ages – the ages between five and twelve.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

About the only thing you can say for his constipation of ideas is his diarrhea of words.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

The triumph of sugar over diabetes.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

Politics is the pursuit of trivial men who, when they succeed at it, become important in the eyes of more trivial men.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

I drink to make other people seem more interesting.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

Opening night: The night before the play is ready to open.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor