Keyword: Bad

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Characteristics Success

It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

(1903 – 1968) movie actress
Characteristics Girls People Women

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Life

Logic is a system whereby one may go wrong with confidence.

(1876 – 1958) inventor
Characteristics Problems

I've been accused of vulgarity, and I say that's bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Characteristics Communication Language

If you go to any book store and look at any book on marriage, you'll see at least one photo of me about to put an ice tray with only one ice cube left in it back into the refrigerator.

(1955 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & impressionist
Characteristics Husbands Marriage

The function of vice is to keep virtue within reasonable bounds.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Characteristics

Wickedness is always easier than virtue; for it takes the short cut to everything.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Characteristics

It's [a movie script] about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Characteristics

There's so much good in the worst of us, and so many of the worst of us get the best of us, that the rest of us aren't even worth talking about.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Characteristics People

The best years are the forties; after fifty a man begins to deteriorate, but in the forties he is at the maximum of his villainy.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Age Characteristics Life

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Girls Places

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Elections/Voting Government Politicians

I am the common denominator to all my bad relationships.

(1966 – 2011) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Relationships Self

I'm as pure as the driven slush.

(1903 – 1968) movie actress
Characteristics

When we got into office, the thing that surprised me most was to find that things were just as bad as we'd been saying they were.

(1917 – 1963) 35th U.S. president
Characteristics Communication Problems

Things could always be worse; for instance, you could be ugly and work in the Post Office.

writer, humorist, columnist & speaker
Appearance Characteristics Ugly Work

It is well-known what a middleman is; he is a man who bamboozles one party and plunders the other.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Characteristics People

Living in a vacuum sucks.

writer, humorist, columnist & speaker
Characteristics Life

The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act, even when it has worked and he has not been caught.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics