Subject: Age » Old (Page 3)

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must’ve been something before electricity.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Age Insults Old TV/Movie Quotes

Good taste is the worst vice ever invented.

(1887 – 1964) English biographer, critic, novelist & poet
Characteristics Old Opinion

Dinah [Shore] formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles.

(1919 – 2006) American comedian & actor
Age Food/Drink Old People

Everybody wants to live forever, but nobody wants to grow old.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Age Old Young

I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Old

Old people love to give good advice; it compensates them for their inability to set a bad example.

(1613 – 1680) French writer
Age Intelligence Old People

She is such a good friend that she would throw all her acquaintances into the water for the pleasure of fishing them out again.

(1754 – 1838) French prime minister & diplomat
Friends Old People

Some folks as they grow older grow wise, but most folks simply grow stubborner.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Age Old Wisdom

I’m at the age where I can’t take anything with a grain of salt.

American comedian
Age Old

You know, you get that tattoo of barbed wire when you’re 18, but by the time you’re 80, it’s a picket fence.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Age Appearance Body Old Young

You ever drive around with an old person who knows where everything didn't used to be?

American stand-up comedian
Age Intelligence Memory Old

What's the advantage of having a kid at 49?… you can both be in diapers at the same time?

stand-up comedian
Age Children Old

I don't need drugs anymore, thank God; I can get the same effect just by standing up real fast.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Age Drugs Old

I am in the prime of senility.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Age Memory Mind Old

Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that can happen to a man.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Age Old People Situations

You know you're getting old when kids start to dress like you used to.

(1936 – 2014) American standup comedian, actor & author
Age Appearance Clothing Old

Anyone can get old; all you have to do is live long enough.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Old

Golden Years My Ass: Adventures in Geriatric Indignity

Age Book Titles Old

The reason old men use Viagra is not that they are impotent. It’s that old women are so very ugly.

(1972 – ) Anglo-Irish comedian, writer & actor
Age Old Sex

I feel I can talk with more authority, especially when I say, ‘I don’t know.’

(1921 – 2004) English actor & author
Age Old

I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Friends Intelligence Old People