Subject: Classifieds (Page 6)

YOUTH PROGRAMS • GENERAL/SOCIAL – Skydiving for Tots – (ages 10 mos.–2 years) Introduce your toddler to the fun and thrill of skydiving before he or she develops unwarranted fears of freefalling. Certified jump instructor…

Classifieds

MEATER READERS – Entry Level $16/hr + benefits, Call…

Classifieds

FOR SALE. Three canaries of undermined sex.

Classifieds

WANTED – Workaholic for special department, all shifts. Highly reliable – no vacation or sick leave. Must be flexible, intelligent and friendly.

Classifieds

Will the person who got hit in the head with a tomato in the 1950’s please contact (414) 453…

Classifieds

If You Had No Idea What To Get Her For Valentine’s Day… Imagine How Overwhelming Arranging Her Funeral Would Be. Give her the perfect gift, make pre-arrangements as a couple with the affordable funeral home. Choose from affordable funeral services or affordable cremations. Compassion is our passion…

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Lost – Donkey, wearing a pink halter, Monterey Center – 269-793-….

Classifieds

Wanted: Preparer of food. Must like the food business, be dependable, and be willing to get hands dirty.

Classifieds

All Remaining Furniture 1/2 Price to 50% Off – Storewide!

Classifieds

LARGE REWARD: creamy white male puddle in Pasadena area in found Please Call…

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For Sale:  Women’s clothes. Owned by future ex-wife, need to sell quick before divorce.

Classifieds

Christmas tag sale. Handmade gifts for the hard to find person.

Classifieds

Not everyone appearing in this column is a deranged cross-dressing sociopath. Let me know if you find one and I'll strangle him with my bra. Man, 56.

Classifieds

We meet every Friday of the month except the first and third.

Classifieds

Finally – a calculator that has no equal.

Classifieds

Are all on-line realtors created equal? No, there's only one!

Classifieds

Algonquin Jaycees – in cooperation with: Citizens Against Drunk Driving – are offering a Sobering deal… a FREE Sandwich with the purchase of 20 beers

Classifieds

Now I know what to do the next time my patents die… – If you are inheriting someone’s IRA/401K/TSP or Annuity…

Classifieds

WANTED: Medium sized dog house for low income family. Call 269-….

Classifieds

Slut in the kitchen, chef in the bedroom. Woman with mixed priorities (37) seeks man who can toss a good salad.

Classifieds

FREE DUCKS. You catch.

Classifieds