Subject: Communication » Language

George Moore wrote excellent English until he discovered grammar.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

Another term for a balloon is a bad breath holder.

(1973 – ) American comedian

I have been called too vague by you know who… but you know the old saying…

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

England and America are two countries separated by a common language.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

Ways to Relieve Stress #10: Make up a language and ask people for directions.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Patience: A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Misnomer: The right name for the wrong word.

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

English? Who needs that? I’m never going to England.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

I invented a new word – “plagiarism.”

See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president

Umm, trouble with grammar have I, yes?

Movie character in, Star Wars (Frank Oz)

I bought a dictionary, and the first thing I did was look up dictionary… it said “you’re an asshole.”

(1973 – ) American comedian

It is a cliché that most clichés are true, but then like most clichés, that cliché is untrue.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director

Italian Without Words

Oral contraceptive: The word "no."

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator

Opera in English is, in the main, just about as sensible as baseball in Italian.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

And don't use conjunctions to start sentences.

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist