Subject: Communication » Language (Page 5)

Carlyle said, “A lie cannot live;” it shows he did not know how to tell them.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Characteristics Communication Language Lies

Anything in parentheses can be ignored.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together; it was riveting.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Children Communication Language

About sentence fragments.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Marriage: The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Marriage

Anyone can tell the truth, but only very few of us can make epigrams.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Characteristics Communication Language Reading/Writing Truth

Pessimism: A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

Me and my wife met at a Castanet class… we clicked.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Marriage Wives

What happened to the first 6 “ups?”

Communication Food/Drink Language

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
Communication Language

Four-letter Word: Par for the coarse.

Definitions Golf Language Sports

I was in a book store and saw a French looking girl, she was bi-illterate… she couldn’t read in two languages.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Reading/Writing

Outdo: To make an enemy.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Language Time

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch?”

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Communication Eating Language People Speech

She went into the hospital after being bitten by a spider in a bathing suit.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Language Misspokements

Connoisseur: A specialist who knows everything about something and nothing about anything else.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Intelligence Language

When in doubt, ascribe all quotations to Bernard Shaw.

(1944 – ) English writer & broadcaster
Communication Language Reading/Writing

The first man to compare the cheeks of a young woman to a rose was obviously a poet; the first to repeat it was possibly an idiot.

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Fools Intelligence Language

I invented a new word – “plagiarism.”

Communication Language Wordplay