Subject: Communication (Page 56)

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Language

Satire is focused bitterness.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Communication Language

I'm gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication Language Reading/Writing

If pro is the opposite of con, what's the opposite of progress?

(1918 – 2009) radio broadcaster
Communication Wordplay

Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Communication Reading/Writing

Interviewer: You’ve been accused of vulgarity.
Brooks: Bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Communication Language

Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by spontaneously moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

He who shouts loudest has the floor.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

Plagiarism: Failure to adorn stolen ideas with footnotes, as opposed to scholarship, which repeatedly acknowledges the theft.

Definitions Ideas Reading/Writing

If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient; it may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Communication Speech

Watch out for irregular verbs which has cropped up into our language.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Man does not live by words alone, despite the fact that sometimes he has to eat them.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
Communication Food/Drink Language

He was married to an acrobat, but she caught him in the act.

Communication Wordplay

I think it would be really confusing if you’re performing an abortion and somebody runs in and says, “Abort! Abort!”

(1981 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Communication Language Situations

I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Communication

I'm astounded by people who take 18 years to write something; that's how long it took that guy to write 'Madame Bovary,' and was that ever on the best-seller list?

(1946 – ) American actor
Communication Reading/Writing

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Communication Language Reading/Writing Speech

All publicity is good, except an obituary notice.

(1923 – 1964) Irish poet, short story writer, novelist & playwright
Communication

When I hear a baby, I always write down the noises he makes, so later I can ask him what he meant.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Children Communication Family

See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Communication Language Work

After all is said and done, more is said than done.

(c. 620 – 564 BC) Greek slave and author of over 600 fables
Communication Speech