Subject: Death (Page 19)

I don't jog; if I die I want to be sick.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Activities Death

Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow's paper? 'French Fries'!

(c.1936 – 1966) American convicted murderer
Last words

The great thing about the dead, they make space.

(1932 – 2009) author, poet & critic
Death People

If you eat one apple a day for 80 years, you won't die young.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter
Age Death Food/Drink Health

My young son asked me what happens after we die; I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies; I guess I should have told him the truth – that most of us go to Hell and burn eternally, but I didn't want to upset him.

Death

There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death

I want to die like my father, quietly, in his sleep – not screaming and terrified like his passengers.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Death

Martyrdom is the only way a man can become famous without ability.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death

Epitaph: A belated advertisement for a line of goods that has been permanently discontinued.

Death Definitions

If your time ain’t come, not even a doctor can kill you.

Death Doctors Health Life Proverbs

A dying man can do nothing easily.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Last words

Waiting, are they? Waiting, are they? Well, let 'em wait!

(1738 – 1789) American farmer, businessman, writer, politician & patriot
Last words

Will: A dead giveaway.

Death Definitions

I’m always angry when I’m dying.

(1923 – 2009) English barrister, dramatist, screenwriter & author
Death Last words

Walter Pidgeon

William Henry Pratt (1887 – 1969) English actor
Last words

I was married twice; my first wife died and my second one wouldn't.

(1955 – ) American comedian
Death Marriage

My aunt passed away two weeks ago; she was cremated – and we think that's what did it.

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian
Death

If my dead father was alive to hear that, it would kill him.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Death Family Fathers Misspokements Situations Travel

Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Death

I was going to commit suicide the other day, but I must not have been serious because I brought a beach towel.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Death

The idea is to die young as late as possible.

Age Death Murphy’s Laws Time Young