Subject: Definitions (Page 20)

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Blind Date: When you expect to meet a vision and he turns out to be a sight.

Dating Definitions

Bragging: The patter of tiny feats.

Definitions

Honest Politician: One who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Definitions Government Politicians

Tomorrow: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

Definitions Future Time

Dandruff: Chips off the old block.

Definitions

Book: What they make a movie out of for television.

(1904 – 1974) American author & radio producer
Books Communication Definitions

Toothache: The pain that drives you to extraction.

Definitions Health

Exaggeration: Formal term for a collection of fishermen (i.e. an exaggeration of anglers).

Activities Definitions Language

Dorito Syndrome: Feelings of emptiness and dissatisfaction triggered by addictive substances that lack nutritional content.

Definitions Food/Drink

Taxpayer: A person who has the government on his payroll.

Definitions Government Taxes

Conference: A meeting at which people talk about what they should already be doing.

Definitions

Vasectomy: Never having to say you’re sorry.

Definitions

Analysis: An excuse to take something to pieces to see how it works.

Definitions

Baby: An inhabitant of Lapland.

Children Definitions Family

Bachelor: A person who believes in life, liberty, and the happiness of pursuit.

Definitions Men People Relationships

Tolerance: That uncomfortable feeling that the other fellow might be right after all.

Beliefs Characteristics Definitions

Nostalgia: How long’s that been around?

(1965 – ) English comedian, musician, actor & author
Definitions History Time

Puttering: Woman’s word for man’s work.

Definitions

Love: The triumph of imagination over intelligence.

Definitions Emotions Love

Education: Forcing abstract ideas into concrete heads.

Definitions Ideas Intelligence

Gardener: Someone who thinks that what goes down must come up.

Definitions