Subject: Emotions (Page 6)

Nervous as a hound pissing peach pits

Emotions Expressions

My grief counsellor died the other day… but he was so good I didn’t give a shit.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Death Emotions

Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.

(1909 – 2000) Danish-born comedian & pianist
Emotions Laughter

A woman in love can't be reasonable – or she probably wouldn't be in love.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Love Women

I’m a sensitive guy; I held a baby the other day and it was the first time either of us cried.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor
Children Emotions

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Happiness Language People Sex

In real love you want the other person's good; in romantic love, you want the other person.

(1886 – 1973) American writer
Emotions Love Sex

A man in love is like a clipped coupon… it's time to cash in.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Love Men People

Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Government Laughter People

You can do what you want, but saving love doesn't bring any interest.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Love

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn’t understand math.

(1978 – ) American comedian & writer
Emotions Love Money People Women

The look of love wears a blindfold and smells like the trunk of my car.

(1982 – ) American author
Emotions

If it bends it's funny. If it breaks, it's not funny.

(1936 – ) American actor, director & screenwriter
Emotions

I hope they bury me near a straight man.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Death Emotions

There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer
Emotions Entertainment Film

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.

(1875 – 1965) German/French theologian, organist, philosopher, physician & medical missionary
Emotions Happiness Health Intelligence Memory

Love looks through a telescope, envy through a microscope.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Emotions Love

I’m in love with a philosophy major, and she doesn’t even know I exist – and worse… she can prove it.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Emotions Intelligence Love Situations

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Emotions Happiness Women

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Emotions Happiness Love Men Women

On a beautiful day like this it's hard to believe anyone can be unhappy – but we'll work on it.

Emotions Happiness Murphy’s Laws