Subject: Entertainment (Page 30)

I saw a commercial on late night TV, it said,“Forget everything you know about slipcovers,” so I did, and it was a load off my mind; then the commercial tried to sell me slipcovers, and I didn’t know what the hell they were.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment Memory Television

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Life Music Situations

I would rather see the portrait of a dog that I know, than all the allegorical paintings they can show me in the world.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Art Communication Entertainment

Who among us has not gazed thoughtfully and patiently at a painting of Jackson Pollock and thought… "What a piece of crap?"

American television producer, screenwriter, executive producer & author
Art Insults

Play us a medley of your hit.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Entertainment Insults Music

If you're gonna see a play about slavery, it's important that you watch it with your white friends because you know they're gonna pick up dinner that night.

American stand-up comedian
Entertainment People

He got a reputation as a great actor by just thinking hard about the next line.

(1894 – 1982) American film director, film producer & screenwriter
Acting Insults

They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian; well, they’re not laughing now.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Emotions Entertainment Laughter People

I want to be a diva… like people-totally-respect-my-music diva, not diva like carry-my-Diet-Coke-around.

(1980 – ) American singer
Music Success

Isn't it possible for them to get a real fascist instead of this guy who plays one on TV?

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Characteristics Communication Television

She stopped the show – but then the show wasn't traveling very fast.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Acting Communication Entertainment Reviews/Criticism

A musicologist is a man who can read music but can’t hear it.

(1879 – 1961) English conductor
Entertainment Music

The real reason I decided on show business was to avoid a day job.

(1963 – ) American actor, comedian, screenwriter & director
Entertainment Work

Why should I paint dead fish, onions and beer glasses; girls are so much prettier. 

(1883 – 1956) French painter & printmaker
Art Entertainment

Acting: A good training for political life; the only problem is the speeches are harder to learn.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Acting Entertainment Occupations

The titles are listed on the movie theater marquis.

Entertainment Malaprops

You know you're working class when your TV is bigger than your bookcase.

English standup comedian
Entertainment People Television

He makes you feel more danced against than with.


Dance Entertainment

For those of you watching who do not have television sets, live commentary is on Radio 2.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Entertainment Misspokements Sports Television

A musical is a series of catastrophes ending with a floor show.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Entertainment

If they liked you, they didn’t applaud – they just let you live.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Entertainment