Subject: Marriage » Wives

Wealth is any income that is at least one hundred dollars a year more than the income of one’s wife’s sister’s husband.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Money Wealth Wives

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Husbands Men People Success Wives Women

There's only one thing wrong with wife swapping… you get another wife.

writer, website creator
Marriage Sex Wives

I am a very committed wife, and I should be committed too – for being married so many times.

(1932 – 2011) British-American actress
Marriage Self Wives

The secrets of success are a good wife and a steady job… my wife told me.

(1920 – 1991) American poet
Marriage Success Wives

I went to look for a used car and found my wife's dress in the back seat.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Autos Clothing Sex Wives

Every American woman has two souls to call her own, the other being her husband's.

(1877 – 1947) British diarist & critic
Husbands Marriage Wives

My wife went to a beauty parlor and got a mudpack; for two days she looked nice, then the mud fell off.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Appearance Body Marriage Wives

My toughest fight was with my first wife.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Fights Marriage Relationships Sports Wives

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Husbands Marriage Things Wives

My wife has just two complaints: first, she’s got absolutely nothing to wear and second, she’s run out of closet space to keep it in.

Appearance Clothing Wives

My wife’s gotten really lazy, or as she calls it, ‘pregnant.'

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Marriage Wives

My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Animals Dogs Marriage Wives

If you would like to get your wife’s attention – just look comfortable!.

Marriage Wives

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Definitions Marriage Wives

I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is "don't tell the butcher!"

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Marriage Sex Situations Wives

Whatever arrangement you make for the division of household duties, your husband's job will be easier.

Housework Husbands Murphy’s Laws Wives

There is a vast difference between the savage and the civilized man, but it is never apparent to their wives until after breakfast.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Eating Food/Drink Husbands Marriage Wives

One man's folly is another man's wife.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Men People Wives

I know not which lives more unnatural lives, obeying husbands, or commanding wives.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Husbands Life Marriage Wives

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

(1885 – 1957) French stage actor, film actor, director, screenwriter & playwright
Marriage Wives