Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 8)

Rehabilitation

Miscellaneous

You learn more character on the two-yard line than anywhere else in life.

American football player, coach & administrator
Miscellaneous

I said to my wife, ‘Guess what I heard in the pub? … They reckon the milkman has made love to every woman in this road except one’ and she said, ‘I’ll bet it’s that stuck-up Phyllis at number 23.’

typographer
Miscellaneous

Skin your own skunk

Miscellaneous

He sticks to that boy like white on rice.

Miscellaneous

When I think of all the hours and hours of my life I have spent watching television, it makes me realize, Man, I am really rich with television.

Miscellaneous

If enough people tell you you’re dead, you ought to lay down.

Miscellaneous

Just because a chicken has wings doesn't mean it can fly.

Miscellaneous

She couldn't keep her dress down.

Miscellaneous

Mean enough to charge hell with a quart of ice water.

Miscellaneous

Knee high to a grasshopper

Miscellaneous

Don’t ever get your speedometer confused with your clock, like I did once, because the faster you go, the later you think you are.

Miscellaneous

It’s as hot as blue blazes.

Miscellaneous

If you need somebody to push you in the creek, just lemme know.

Miscellaneous

Treated him like a red-headed stepchild.

Miscellaneous

He's tighter than a fiddle string

Miscellaneous

Well, shut my mouth.

Miscellaneous

About as useful as buttons on a dishrag

Miscellaneous

Nobody’s perfect… well there was this one guy, but we killed him…

(1957 – ) American author
Miscellaneous

To become a knife thrower in the circus, they probably don’t let you start off throwing at a live woman; they start you out with a little girl.

Miscellaneous

I don’t pretend to have all the answers; I don’t pretend to even know what the questions are… hey, where am I?

Miscellaneous