Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Misspokements
(Page 37)
Her husband was
infidelicate
with another woman.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements
Infidelity
Show me where to put my John
Hancrock.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements
Hancock
Best player ever? … I’d have to go with the immoral Babe Ruth.
Johnny Logan
professional baseball player
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
Cricket shouldn't be used as a political football.
David Graveney
English cricketer
Misspokements
Sports
Cricket
Without him here, it is impossible to know how fast he will play it, approximately.
Eugene Ormandy
(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment
Misspokements
Music
I think that was a moment of cool panic there.
Ron Atkinson
English former football player & manager
Misspokements
Those are the sort of doors that get opened if you don't close them.
Terry Venables
English football player & manager
Misspokements
That was the straw that twisted the camel's neck.
Unknown
Misspokements
Mixed metaphors
Innocent
stand-byer
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements
Bystander
All of his saves have come during relief appearances.
Ralph Kiner
(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
… standing there making a sitting target of himself.
Terry Lawless
English boxing manager & trainer
Boxing
Misspokements
Sports
George W. Bush did a incredible job in the presidency, defending us from freedom.
Rick Perry
(1950 – ) American politician & 47th governor of Texas
Misspokements
George W. Bush
Jimmy Hill: Don’t sit on the fence Terry, what chance do you think Germany has got of getting through?
Venables: I think it’s fifty-fifty.
Terry Venables
English football player & manager
Misspokements
Sports
Chances
Odds
Here they come, every color of the rainbow: black, white, brown.
David Coleman
(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Women
Liberteens
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements
TV/Movie Quotes
Libertarians
Tonight I’m going to listen with my ears.
Eugene Ormandy
(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment
Misspokements
Music
Listening
I have made good judgements in the past; I have made good judgements in the future.
Dan Quayle
(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements
Decisions
Judgment
The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level.
Chuck Lamar
professional baseball player & executive
Misspokements
Sports
Success
Don't pay any attention to the critics; don't even ignore them.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Misspokements
Occupations
Opinion
Critics
Oxymorons
Gary always weighed up his options, especially when he had no choice.
Kevin Keegan
English football player & manager
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis’s misses every chance he gets.
Mike Hallett
professional snooker player & commentator
Misspokements
Sports
Discussing missed snooker shots
Page 37 of 53
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